Whether it’s general fear of the unknown or you’ve just come down with a serious case of the new teacher/new school/new curriculum/new everything jitters, back to school time can create a wide range of emotions for both parents and children. How to ease the transition and add some zen back into the zany first days and weeks? Psychotherapist and parenting consultant Beth Bochner shares with us five important steps you can take to ensure a smooth start to the school year.
1. Let your child know that if they are feeling nervous they are certainly not alone. Their classmates and even their teacher feel a little nervous too. Sharing stories from your own childhood school days helps open the door to good conversation about your childs concerns
2. Set up a play date at the school during these last weeks of summer. This will help connect your child to a classmate and also familiarize or re-familiarize your child with the playground area which helps minimize fears about recess.
3. If your young child has anxiety about the school bus you can play “pretend school bus” and take turns being the driver and the student. Your child has a chance to “practice” and master this concept before actually going for his or her first ride.
4. You may also want to use the last weeks of summer getting into more of a school time rhythm. Being mindful of bedtime, wake up time and meal times and making them more similar to the schedule you will have once school starts makes the transition less challenging.
5. Remove as many unknowns as possible. Not knowing your teacher, classroom or schedule can be scary. As soon as information about these things become available let your child know. If your child is moving on to a new school then visiting the school prior to opening day does wonders for calming those jittery feelings.
If the anxiety intensifies or continues past the first few weeks of school you may want to consider speaking to your pediatrician or seeking the advice of a child psychotherapist. Just remember that as the school year approaches all parents and their children have hopes and dreams for what the year will bring. Just keep in mind that there are many ups and downs, good moments and some difficult ones too. However, when you set the stage with open communication and a positive attitude you are laying the groundwork for a successful school year.
Dr. Beth Bochner, PhD, LMSW, is a Psychotherapist and Parenting Consultant who specializes in working with children, adolescents and adults in Bergen County.
